My Addled Brain

Currently playing: The Hives - HateTo Say I Told You So

So, I went sailing again this weekend. Met up with Cap’n Larry at his house, only this time his wife Jennifer came, with a friend of hers from work, Emma. Unfortunately for us, we got a late start, and by the time we got to our destination, Egmont Key, we honestly should have turned right back around for the docks. Instead, we not only threw caution to the wind, we tossed common sense right out with it, nearly killed a group of kids (well, ok, it wasn’t THAT bad, but at the time, it sure looked like it), and nearly plowed into another boat on the way out (again, the situation was actually well in hand, but that didn’t stop strangers from yelling at us). By the time we got to the pier at Ft. De Soto (where we dropped off the girls; they had parked there so they could get home earlier) it was getting near 6 PM. At this point, you’d think, with the sun going down, we’d head back up the coast to the docks, the same way we came in, right? Well, wrong, actually. Remember, caution and common sense were floating somewhere in the Gulf of Mexico, miles from where we were. So, we decided to sail up the opposite side of the coast, and take the ship channel along the Sunshine Skyway Bridge back to the docks. A longer route, but a much more scenic one, to be sure. And it was a gorgeous ride back in, with the sun setting over Ft. De Soto as we headed toward the bridge. And all of this was fine and dandy until we ran aground trying to find the channel in the dark.

It took a minute to realize we actually weren’t moving anymore. We had felt the bumps of the sea floor (an odd thing to call sand under a foot and a half of water, but there you go) on the bottom of the boat, but it looked like we were actually in the channel. It probably didn’t help that I had no idea how to read a sea map, even a computerized one hooked up to a GPS. And after further inspection of the map, what we were in wasn’t a channel at all. The actual channel wasn’t far off, but in the dark, with the hard chop of the tide coming back in, and the fact that the channel was only about fifty feet wide (that may not sound small to you, but you try and steer a 27′ boat with a stick attached to a bent rudder and see how well YOU fare), we suddenly discovered caution floating alongside the boat (common sense, it seemed, had escaped us for good). We decided to turn around, and take the long, but known, route back to the docks, using the outboard motor to help us escape our sandy doom.

* Sandy doom? MUAhahahahahaha! *

Anyway.

On the way back, I paused to take in my surroundings. By this point, it was about 10 PM. The Cap’n had already called his wife to let her know what had happened, and after that, there wasn’t much to talk about. We were both tired from the day’s trip. The only sound to be heard was the soft rolling of the waves against the hull; with the wind at our backs, they were moving only slightly faster than us. The moon was out, full and bright against the dark sky, and it’s reflection on the inky surface of the water created a constantly shifting kaliedoscope of light and dark, rolling along with us, breathtaking in it’s beauty.

I can understand why people fall in love with the sea now.

We got back to the dock at 12:45 AM, a mere 16 hours after we had gotten there. We were both ravenously hungry, completely exhausted, and rather cold. Well, I guess I was the only one who was cold, because the good Cap’n thought it would be more comfortable to blast the AC once we got back in his car. Two shut vents and thirty minutes later, we arrived at his house. I think he mumbled a goodbye, but I don’t recall completely. I drove off from his house, stopping to make a Border Run™. 3 Meximelts and a Medium Pepsi got me home alive and fed.

It’s two days later, and I ache everywhere. Amazingly, I seem to not have burned, but we’ll find out in a few days when my skin decides whether or not to do it’s leper impersonation. Lessons were learned by someone, I’m sure, but it probably wasn’t me.

On a completely different note, We here at the Brain would like to congratulate Jamie and Roger on their engagement. Roger is a fine lad, and I think his method of proposal will go down in the annals of history as one of the greatest ever. But I’ll save that for later.

Currently playing: Rob Zombie - Never Gonna Stop

First: Thank you, Stuff Magazine.

Now that we have that out of the way, here’s your long-absent dose of prattle. Not that I care. Whatever! I can do what I want!

I feel as though I’m repeating myself, but: work’s been a bear lately. I know that none of you really want or need to listen to my incessant whining about how work has grown lately, so I will spare you from the thrill and excitement of coding and re-coding. Suffice it to say that I won’t be losing my job from lack of business anytime soon.

This weekend, I, along with MCG and MCGMKAW (see Of No Importance, as I refuse to spell these out anymore), visited my cousin in the small Stepford Wives-esque town of Celebration, Florida. It was her birthday, and we (along with her boyfriend, his sister, and her husband) proceeded to enjoy a fine weekend, full of eating, playing games, and meeting Pentacostal waitresses that enjoy rave clubs. "Like, I TOTALLY believe in it!" was her response when asked if she bought into the whole talking in tongues bit.

Lord, I apologize for making fun of the Pentacostal waitress, and be with the starving Pygmies in New Guinea, Amen.

I also learned that Clayton (the aforementioned husband of my cousin’s boyfriend’s sister) is being harrassed by terrorists or something. Personally, I find it all a bit confusing, but it’s got something to do with money laundering/fraud. Beats me. You’re talking to a guy that had to take Macroeconomics twice. Robby, however, finds the whole thing rather amusing for some reason.

* No comment. *

In an unrelated story, he’s got a cool website, if you’re into technical training.

And finally, I would be remiss if I didn’t pass these two gems along to you:

1) What’s wrong with this picture? (Be patient, it may take you a minute or two.)

2) A small piece of advice. Possibly from the Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter-Day Saints.

Currently playing: The Dave Brubeck Quartet - Take Five

I went to Orlando on Thursday to watch the movie with a couple of people I knew from UF, and met with them and their significant others/good friends/completestrangers. A friendly AddledBrain hello to: Gina, Flex, Kristin, Cara (hope I got those last two right), Stacy, Anja, Jane, Keith, Jim, Craig, and everyone else who’s names I can’t possibly be expected to remember. Yes, Gina, this is your cue to e-mail me with everyone’s names I forgot. Not that I plan on posting them, mind you. After the movie, we enjoyed a late dinner at the RainforestCafe, where Keith kept running into the brick wall that was Cara’s libido. Gotta give the man credit for trying, but it just looked painful from where I was sitting. After that, some of us went our separate ways. I ended up sleeping on the top bunk in Gina’s "suite". I’m not sure, but I think a suite should consist of more than a queen size bed and three walled-off single beds, two of which are stacked on top of one another. We stayed up for a while, chatting about whatever, and eventually went to sleep, where I, apparently, snored like a grizzly.

And a correction to the story I told over dinner: the gentleman who’s car I borrowed was not Rich. It was John. AddledBrain apologises to anyone offended with that incorrect statement.

Pictures of our little soiree will be posted as soon as I get my camera back from Gina, whom I conveniently left it with. I am told to expect some interesting pictures that I didn’t take on it, so after I get it back, I’ll decide whether to slap on an 18-or-older splash page on the front of the site. Just because I don’t fear you girls doesn’t mean I trust you.

For those of you who haven’t seen Ep.II yet…shame on you. Yes, everything you heard about the dialogue being cheesy and the acting being wooden is absolutely true. But all of that is made up with what is, quite possibly, one of the most astounding action sequence in the history of film. So switch off the brain and enjoy watching Jedi slap people around with shiny sticks. But you people haven’t been waiting for me to ramble on about the movie, you’ve been waiting for this:

Galactic treason;
A very lame love story.
Yoda kicks your ass.

Saturday was the Turdlet’s birthday. She’s a whopping 6 years old. MCG held a birthday party for her at his house, his first kid’s birthday party. Well, to be more specific, MCGMKAW held the party, but since they’re married and all…but anyway. Screaming little girl hijinx abounded, and lessons were learned. More specifically: when having a piñata at a children’s party, be sure to have a tree to hang it from, and not suspend it on an extension cord between yourself and another male. Plastic mop handle + blindfolded little girl + candy prize = whacked scrotum fun for everyone. Well, maybe not everyone. Since the party was a sleepover, MGC and I treked back to Orlando, to watch Ep.II, this time in the Digital Projection theater. Lemmetellyasomethin. The image from the DLP was amazing. Like I was watching a ginormous® plasma television. Crisp, clear, and nary a stray pixel to be found. If you have one of these theaters within driving distance from you, make the trek; your retinas will thank you. We drove back in the wee hours of the morn, bleary eyed but sated, and I slept on his couch where I, apparently, snored like a grizzly.

Sunday was dinner at the Padre’s new digs. It’s downright wierd to see them in a different house. And it’s even wierder to find them in a two story house. But it’s a very nice house, and their kitchen is sweet. I want their refrigerator. Badly. I realize my lust for their appliances makes me an old person. But I’m perfectly happy to consider myself old if it means I have their fridge. Robby was less impressed, but then again, any house without an evil robot factory in it is no place for him.

* AHEM *

Sorry. What I meant to say was, any house without a morally challenged robot factory in it is no place for him.

* Better. Now, have you seen that Pikachu prototype running around anywhere? I forgot to remove his Asimov protocols, so all he does is squeal "Pika-pika-pik" and randomly hug things. I want electrified four-year-olds, dammit!*

No I haven’t. And Pikachu is so five minutes ago.

* WHAT? Well, what about my army of Bionicle droids? Aren’t THEY hip? *

Oh man. This could take a while…

Updated: New e-mail

Currently playing: Radiohead - Kid A

Good lord, is there a lot to tell.

I have just learned that an important project I have been working on for the last few days has already been done, last week, by someone else. I’m actually not nearly as irritated by this as you might imagine. It got me to work with some new concepts I hadn’t tried before, and I came up with some funky solutions for some funky problems. But the whole communication issue is obviously troubling.

It seems the office move is proceeding apace. Actually, it’s more like the office move, traipsing along through the forest, stumbled into a pack of angry, bloodthirsty bears, and is running for it’s life toward home. They want to find an office space down here in the next 30 days, a large space with 6000-9000 square feet. That’s buildout space for 20-some-odd employees and a small gym. This is a good thing. In my opinion, they can’t move this along fast enough, and I’m glad they’re having a sense of urgency about this. But the size surprises me. I thought they we’re just going to rent us a closet somewhere an throw us in. And that would have been fine, honestly. But this news is great.

The Madre is doing well. I got to see her over the grand fiesta that is Mother’s Day, and aside from having a rather nasty sore throat, she’s doing well. I got her a gift certificate to Borders (and let’s be honest, who DOESN’T like Borders?) and cooked lunch: barbecued pork burritos. Numm numms. Major Cool Guy & Co. go her some bath stuff, and my Evil Twin got her a digital camera. Fun was had by all, especially the part when most of us fell asleep on the couch. She gets the gel packing removed Thursday, and will return back to scenic Lawenceville sometime this weekend.

Another movie review: Changing Lanes

Affleck and Jackson
Try to out punk each other.
Dear God, kill me now.

I know, this is another Haiku. But I came up with this one while sitting in anguish through this movie, so I had to use it.

Finally, Andy introduced me to this site. You can spend HOURS here. Enjoy.

Updated: New E-Mail Response
Updated: Links

Currently playing: The Police - Truth Hits Everybody

For those of you who couldn’t find us for a couple of days, fret no more! We’re back, at our new and improved (I think…does the site seem slow to you?) webspace, permanently affixed to www.addledbrain.com! We’d be excited, but having the site down for three days kinda took the wind out of our sails.

Crazy week. The Madre is down from scenic Lawrenceville, GA for a lovely bit of surgery. Nothing too horrendous, just a deviated septum (or as we like to call it, a "deviant" septum…30 days in County oughta straighten you out!). She had the surgery yesterday, and is reportedly alive. I say reportedly because I haven’t heard from her yet, but I don’t want to disturb her if she’s feeling a bit "off". But we went to lunch on Wednesday, some delicious roast pork and black beans from "La Teresita", on scenic Boliche Boulevard (that’s Columbus Ave. to you gringos) in the heart of Tampa. Mmm, mmm. I love Cuban food. Screw the beaches, the theme parks, and our oh-so-supportive sports fan base, Cuban food is the REAL reason to live here. Even Robby likes it, and he doesn’t even have a mouth.

* No I don’t. I just agree with you so you’ll quit shouting about black beans and plantains saving the world, or whatever it is you go on about. Now be quiet, I’m working on my Doom Raygun - er, I mean, I’m developing film. *

Well, you don’t have to be such a grouch. Geez.

I think I’m going to start doing a bit of film critique here on the Brain. But in order to keep thing interesting, I’ll force myself to write them in a haiku. Today’s review: Spider-Man.

Peter Parker climbs
Up walls, spinning webs, fighting
crime. This movie rocks out.

Well, maybe not. I think I’ll try a limerick for my next review, which will be for "Attack of the Clones". And if you have no idea what movie I’m talking about, then you must literally live under a rock. And that’s just sad. You really should find a nicer place to live. Try a grocery store: they usually have lots of cardboard out back, enough, I’m sure, to build a respectable shanty out of.

Oh, and since I couldn’t fit it in the haiku: the guy they got to play J. Jonah Jameson was great.

Currently playing: Groove Theory - Tell Me

First up: congratulations to Dawn on her graduation. Your devoted study shall now be rewarded by a lifetime of menial labor. Grats! (Actually, Dawn is pretty cool, and I know she’ll do well in the future).

The week was pretty uneventful. Just more of the same workaday drivel. But it looks like the new office rumors are true, and will happen sometime in the next few months. I, for one, am relieved. Now I can slack off at work and actually worry about being caught. But on the bad side, I won’t be able to go to the office without pants on anymore. Win some, lose some, I always say.

I entered this weekend without any plans whatsoever. Fortunately, a former coworker of mine, Larry, made good on his promise to invite me to go boating with him. Well, not boating, but sailing. Now, I’ve been on a boat plenty of times before, but I have never been sailing. And let me tell you what: it was great. Yeah, you’re not going nearly as fast as a high-speed racing boat. Hell, you’re most likely not even gonna outrun a dingy with an outboard. But the feeling of sailing is absolutely amazing. When you’ve got some good sails up, you’ll feel like you’re damn near flying, especially when you’re heading upwind, and the boat’s heeling at about 25° as you skate across the surface of the water, fighting the rudder to stay on course. It was great, and I hope to do it again soon. Still not as good as sex, though.

Another thing that happened on Saturday: this is an actual conversation that took place between Alex (Larry’s 3 year old son) and myself.

Alex (holding up a small rubber ball): "This ball has sand on it."
Me (peering at the ball): "It sure does. What happened? Did you take it to the beach?"
Alex: "No."
Me: "Okay. Did you play with it outside?"
Alex: "No."
Me (puzzled): "Okay then. How did it get sand on it?"
Alex: "Because the kitchen is dirty."

This was followed up by my losing the ability to form coherent sentences for about two minutes. That kid is funny.

Updated: New E-Mail Response

[Edited 5/7/2002 3:46 PM] - Somebody pointed out that I was actually having the conversation with Alex and me AND myself. This has been corrected. Also needed to add this - John Brogan enjoys the company of little boys.

Currently playing: Andrew W.K. - I Get Wet

As you can tell from my lack of posting, I must be back home. And you’d be right. The "bachelor party" turned into myself and the soon-to-be-wed gentleman in question hitting a couple of rather disappointing bars before heading home for the evening. Oh well.

Been just as busy here, though. I’ve got more reports to put together than I can shake a stick at. And now the rumors are swirling that we may be opening an office here again, which would mean I wouldn’t be working from home anymore. I don’t think that would be such a bad thing - a clear separation between work and the rest of my life would actually be pretty welcome, not to mention a (presumably) shorter drive to work when I DO go in. So I’m all for it. As long as it’s not in SOUTH Tampa.

Just bought a digital camera, and it arrived today. I bought a FujiFilm FinePix 2600Zoom. It rocks. I got it after seeing my brother’s, and finding out he was VERY happy with it. For the stat geeks out there: 2.0 megapixel, SmartMedia(The good stuff), USB connection, and also makes 20 second movies (without audio, but hey, what do you want for an entry level camera?). And it only cost me $219 bucks (plus shipping, that comes to $248, but I did the second day air option.) So, here’s my Pimp Of The Day: Check out CentralDigital.

I got what I wanted, when I wanted it, at the absolute cheapest price on the ‘net. Sure, their web site looks suspiciously like Amazon’s. But I think that only adds to it’s charm. Robby’s happy I got it, too. And he’s already putting it to use; he just came back with a load of shots from a visit to a friend’s house. Here’s a fine example.

Personally, I think it’s a blackmail shot, but Robby insists it’s just a personal gag between a couple of buddies. That explains why he’s cutting letters out of magazines and pasting them on a sheet of paper, naturally.

As some of you know, I play Everquest. For those of you who have only heard about EQ through the recent news, allow me to pony up my opinion on this. (That IS why you visit my site, right?) As tragic as the suicide of anyone is, to point the blame at any one person, or thing, is rather insulting to not only the thing being blamed, but the person who killed themselves. Now, I won’t argue for a minute that video games can be addictive (especially since I am a living example of that addiction). But to say that EQ is "purposely made…in such a way that it is more intriguing to the addict" is a bit ridiculous. Of COURSE the game was made intriguing. IT’S A GAME. They’re designed to be fun and interesting, and to provide something new for the people who play. But making a game the scapegoat for a person’s suicide, especially a person who was "…diagnosed…with depression and schizoid personality disorder, symptoms of which include a lack of desire for social relationships, little or no sex drive and a limited range of emotions in social settings", is the desperate act of a mother who is looking for something - ANYTHING - to blame for the loss of her son. Mrs. Woolley, I feel for your loss. I really do. But if you think a lawsuit is going to fill that void in the world your son left, or accomplish anything other than keeping a bunch of lawyers fed for the next few years, well…I hope you find what you’re looking for. I just don’t think you will.

Now, having said my piece on that: I have been asked, by two of my friends in game, to marry them. Yes, really. They’re both great people, and I wouldn’t think of making fun of them, or their decision, for an instant. And that’s not my concern, anyhow. What I’m concerned about is: how the HELL am I going to officiate a wedding? Me?! Look at my last few postings - are those the thoughts of the kind of person you’d want to join you and your significant other together? I wouldn’t trust myself to do the right thing with a notary stamp, much less marry two people together in the eyes of [insert your deity here]! Dae, Steel (assuming you two are reading this)…I’m honored you chose me, and I’ll be more than happy to perform what you have charged me with. But the fact you two chose ME is the disturbing bit.

Updated: New E-Mail response