My Addled Brain

Currently playing: Live - Untitled song from Throwing Copper, but I call it Horse.

News Flash: My Addled Brain has a new address on the Internet! Just remember www.addledbrain.com, and you’ll be sure to get your every-third-daily-or-so fix of lowbrow entertainment from my site. Look at me, ma, I’s a domain name owner! I’d like to thank my employers, without whom I wouldn’t have gotten the paycheck to help pay for it. It’s quack-tastic!

I just received a thank you note from my former college roommate and current newlywed Calvin Gissendanner. Calvin’s a pretty cool guy. He’s part owner of a Melting Pot restaurant, which already makes him my most successful roommate ever. Except maybe for Felix, who quit working at Intel for his dream job, programming video games. Hmm. I seem to promote success in everyone around me.

Anyway.

I was a groomsman at Calvin’s wedding last year. It was a wonderful affair, full of driving, getting shoes for bridesmaids, driving, rescuing bridesmaids in broken down cars, driving, renting tuxes, driving, buying last minute items for the reception, driving, craving but never quite receiving our recommended daily allowance of alcohol, driving, breaking into apartments, driving, and, oh yes, driving. I have never been so busy in such a short amount of time without having to take a final exam. But the wedding went pretty smoothly, all told, and Calvin married a beautiful woman, and I’m sure they’ll have ridiculously interesting and successful children, all of whom will be just like him, God help us all.

I just wanted to take this opportunity to say: Calvin, I’m glad I could help you out, I’m honored that you chose me to stand with you, and you owe me a night on the town the next time I’m in Miami. Don’t think you’ll be weasling you way out of THAT, mind you. Oh yeah, be sure to send Felix back his clothes, if you haven’t done so already. (I will NOT be explaining this to those of you who are wondering, just know it was my fault.)

* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Stupid human, foolishly mistaking Calvin’s clothes for Felix’s! I’m STILL laughing about that one! *

Well, to be honest, I’d be laughing about it too if I didn’t feel like such a jerk. Ah well. At least the bachelor party went off without a hitch. Hell, we were all so tired, our bachelor party was more of a bachelor moment of respite. It was the shortest part of the weekend. Well, that, and the trip to the grocery store for all that milk. Oh, wait, I wasn’t the one who went with you to do that…